Social Psychologist & Personal Advisor

Dr Matt's Archive of Answers
to Burning Questions

Entangled in the Thick of Thin Things - Part 3

To make a long story short, here are the things my Mother says to me:

- There are clothes that I have in my closet I like better than others
- I like the sweater from the 99 cent store but I don’t love it, even if I bought somewhere else
- The 99 cent sweater is very nice, but I am sure that it would cost about $20 in other stores.
- Mary, you have a wide range of clothes bought at the 99 cent store—retail value from $20 to $100
- Some are better quality than others. The outfit you wore to Julieanne’s party I love and wanted to grab out of your hands.
-The two blouses you bought me I loved. The other two you bought me, I am giving away because I think someone else wore that and I don’t want to wear what someone else bought.” (Mother said this because the inside ticket was not on the blouses).
- How come you like the raincoat you just bought and not the other one you saw, better quality?
- The clothes you bought at the 99 cent store, some are nicer than others.
- The jewelry you bought at the 99 cent are gorgeous costume jewelry, but can you compare it to diamonds.
 
The reason I am asking about these statements made by my Mother, is because of this conversation:

Mom: “As you know tomorrow I am going to visit Doris, but do you remember what I wore the last time I went to visit her”
Mary: “You wore the cashmere sweater”
Mom: “I did”
Mary: “Yes you did. Why don’t you wear the sweater you bought at the 99 cent store”
Mom: “I don’t like it. Can you compare it to the Ralph Lauren or the Vera Wang sweaters.” (Mother bought these sweaters at Lord & Taylors & Kohl’s)
 
This made Mary upset because she thought her Mother was putting down the clothes Mary bought at the 99 cent store, which are gorgeous.
 
Mary: “Are you saying you don’t like your sweater because you bought it at the 99 cent store?

                ** Read Mary's Other Emails about Thin Things:    #1     #2    #3    #4

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Hello Again Mary:

It's been two years since I last heard from you. And it appears you're dealing with essentially the same issues: You're caught up in the "THICK" of "THIN" things—which is tendency that millions of people in this world have. But your quest in life is to be better than "average" . . . your BEST quest is in the pursuit of . . . excellence!

As I did two years ago, I am going to "disappear your question" rather than answer it. Why so? Because life is too short to spend it groveling in mediocrity. Here's the Good News!

I have a very detailed analysis of being "Insulted" versus being "insulting" in my book. You would benefit from learning the distinction—as would a million more people living lives that are caught up in the THICK of THIN THINGS.

What I recommended that you do 2 years ago, . . . still applies: Suggestion #1 and Suggestion #2.

If you sincerely want to move forward in your life—a life committed to excellence—the ideas expressed in my book will absolutely assist you in that Quest . . . for BEST.

Sincerely,

Matt Moody, Ph.D.
Social Psychologist

                Read Mary's Other Emails about Thin Things:    #1     #2    #3    #4

* * * * * * *

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Social Psychologist & Personal Advisor