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The Social Psychology of Situation, Self, & Solutions
Chapter 4 Index: Where Do I Find That?
* Section Heading
9/11, origin of evil acts, 259
Accountability, for addiction and insanity, 50;
rationalizing insanity (footnote), 256
* Accountability for Be-ing is Individual, 55
* Accusing, 184
Act-as-a-Whole, outer action + inner intent, 71, 72;
taking life vs. murder (footnote), 216
Act as if Illusion, 171
Adversity, stumbling block vs.building block, 25, 227, 236, 237;
gleaning lessons from, 38; expanding & maturing, 47;
opportunity to be stronger, 138
Addiction cycle, one choice at a time, 50; explained (footnotes), 143, 145;
we choose (footnote), 256
Affliction, Apostle Paul quote, 34
Agency, not so free, 43-46
Alibis, bad upbringing and mental illness, 259, 260
* All Your Troubles are in JAR, 173
Altruism vs. hedonism, 205, 206
Angel with one wing, 90, 101
Anger, culture accepts and expects coaches, 211
Assume-ing, making an Ass of U & Me, 159
Assumption, foundational, 160, 163
Babies like thermometers, 134, 135
Bad biology, bad brain chemistry or bad genes alibi, 212, 259, 260
Bad upbringing, "even if" scenario, 153; alibi, 259, 260
* Bag, the (miscommunication story), 81
Basic natures, not one but two, 205, 206
Be is up to thee, 256
Be True & Betray, four possibilities, 251
Be-Cause vs. Cause, 26, 55, 238, 255, 261; depression occurs be-cause, 150
Becoming new kind of creature, xiii, 6, 44, 88, 135, 136, 154,
161, 166, 171, 172, 248, 274
* Beginning Right: Asking the Best Questions, 157
Behavior is co-authored, 54, 55; accountability for moral choices, 55, 56;
football analogy, 254, 257
Behaviorism, both fact & fantasy, 241
Being, one basic aspect of self, 61-63; two ways, I-Thou & I-It, 85, 86;
empathic vs. selfish, 87, 88; way of being impacts perception, 127;
being false means seeing false, 174, 193, 194
Be-ing, definition, 65; space between two bodies, 68, 69, 94, 95
Being Alive, song lyrics, 58
* Being Blunt versus Being Honest, 221
* Being Right versus Being True, 220
Being True, not so easy to do, 172, 174; vs. being right, the booby prize, 248, 249
Being vs. Self-Identity, 63, 64
* Believing a Lie: the King's New Clothes, 234
Betrayal, the tell-tale signs, 173, 177, 181, 184, 185, 194
Better vs. Bitter, 14, 15, 249, 250
Big Bang and evolving from dolphins (footnote), 271
Bind, self-perpetuating, 16; blind and oblivious, 156, 157;
Einstein's Mind Bind, 175; stuck in evil orbit, 253;
lack desire to escape, 272, 273
Bitter over Better, reasons we ironically choose, 255
Blame, assigning, a bad beginning, 20;
secular psychology enables blame game, 212, 213
Blind, slightly blind or oblivious, 155-157; why blind? 156
* Blindness of Mind, 192
Blindness story, Gold Metal Resenter, 187-189
* Bobby, the (miscommunication story), 79
Bodily pain vs. suffering of soul, 10, 11, 13
Body physiology, morally neutral, 222, 223
Body, one aspect of self, 61-63; perceiving life from within, 202
Bonds of love, bonds of anguish, 85, 86
Box, thinking outside the, 7
Brady Bunch, Television Intoxication Disorder, 213
Brain chemistry, flows from depress-ability, 150, 153
Brain vs. Mind (footnote), 49
BRIAR Emotion, feelings that are false, 194, 195
Brice, Fanny, on putting up false facades, 98
Buber, Martin, two ways of being: I-Thou & I-It, 85, 86
Building block vs. stumbling block, 236
Car wreck, concern for emotional well-being, as bodily safety, 59
Cause & Effect, 4, 10; vs. Be-Cause, 26, 55, 255; sufficient cause, 55, 65, 254, 255,
(footnote) 257; vs. Constraint & Choice, 65, 66
Cause & Effect Psychology, both fact and fiction simultaneously, 241
* Cause vs. Constraint, 3
Change, Heraclitus quote, x, 218, 274
Change of heart, 88, 142, 247, 248, 274, (footnote) 165;
only change that matters, 266, 267
Change of mind, happens thru change of heart, 87, 88
* Changing the Past, 244
Changing the past, changing mind vs. heart, 244-248
Changing Your Stripes, vital need, 3, 7, 16, 44, 57, 82, 88, 137;
best anti-depressant, 154
Character, transcends body attributes, viii, 60; choice flow from, 56, 60
Chemical imbalance, flows from depress-ability, , 150, 153
Children of the Corn, (footnote), 271
Choice, flows from disposition, 5, 60, the limited nature of, 43-46;
to become Insane, 50; ; clarity vs. confusion, 102, 103;
consequences always attached, 240; to become addicted (footnote), 256
Choosing, mud over healthy meal, 231, 250, 256, 257
Clear Communication, patience essential to, 82
* Clouded Vision: A Cultural Inheritance, 211
Co-Authored, human doing is, 54, 55
Coaching in sports, anger accepted and expected, 211
Cognitive Psychology, inadequate premise for core change, 265, 266
Coming Clean, 104
* Communicative Constraints, 6
Compassion vs contempt, 14
Confusion vs. Clarity, 102, 103
Consequences tied to choices, 240
Constraint, vs. cause, 3; definitions, 4; communicative, 6; physical, 8, 9;
constraint and response, 10
Contempt vs compassion, 14
Conversational Competence, with every aspect of reality, 267, 268
Coping versus Hoping, 270
Covey, Stephen, you see what you are, 89, 125, 126, 226;
can't talk your way out, 181, 217
Crazy and accountable, 50; (footnote), 256
Creation ex nihilo, (footnote), 271
Creator, evidence of = life is self-correcting / karma, 263
Dancing with the Devil, 65, 66, 256, 259, 263, 264, 267-270
Dasein, Heidegger's concept of "being-there", 64
Dead bones, gnawing on yesterday's, 232
Deceived, giving permission via evil reasons, 254, 255
* Defining Emotion, 118
* Defining Emotion via Weakness of Words, 106
* Definitions of Cause & Constraint, 4
Depress-Ability, 150, 153
Depression, occurs for reasons / be-causes, 150;
organically grown, 150, 153; postpartum depression (footnote), 152
Derrida, Jacques, ignorance of truth and reality, quote, 210
Desire, not in you, 165
Despair, an inner decision in the face of affliction, 15
Devil, reality of, 252-259; dancing with, 65, 66, 256, 259, 263, 264, 267-270;
Devil's best lies lined with facts, 269, 270
Dictators, diabolical, shun self-improving feedback, ix
Dis-ease/Dis-Order, you do your mental dis-eases, 146-152;
explained by energy-in-motion, 152-154
* Discerning between Fact & Truth, 219
Disposition, choices flow from, 5, 16, 60; responsible for, 51
* Distinguishing between Self-Identity and Being, 92
Ditch Dwelling, dumped vs. jumped, 263; victim vs. volunteer, 264;
best exit strategy, 265, 266
* Division of Response-Ability, 17
* Do will Flow from You, 170
Doings, are co-authored, 54, 55; versus way of being, 70, 71, 75
Effect & Cause, 10
* Einstein's Mind Bind, 175
Emotion, three definitional types, 106; how words distort conception,
106, 108, 110-113; paradigm shift to correct conception, 114;
analogy to swim-ing, 116; defining, 116, 118; holistic conception includes
four facets, chart, 121, 126; definition by Candace Pert, 122;
learning lessons that they teach, 129; confusing spirit influence,
130, 199, 200; emotional stones must land, 131, 132, 136, 234;
provoke-ability, 134, 135; owning vs rationalizing, 135;
Pure Love vs. Less-than-Love, 196-198; you are the author of, 198;
BRIAR, feelings that are false, 194, 195; with the context
of emotional scars, 232-234
* Emotion as Energy-in-Motion, 131
* Emotion: A Multi-Faceted Activity, 120
* Emotion: Life's Exclamation Point, 128
Emotional Honesty can be dishonest, 221-223
* Emotional Scars: What are they? 232
Emotional scars, myth, 223-227, defined, 234; exist by constraint
and not cause, 237; how to heal, 246-248
* Emotional Self, 105
Empathic vs. Selfish, two basic ways of being, 87, 88
Enduring, N. Maxwell quote, 43
* Energy-in-Motion Explains Dis-Ease & Dis-Order, 152
Energy-in-Motion, emotion as, 131-133; positive, 136; stopping negative, 136, 137
Esoteric City, floating in abstract air of un-grounded rhetoric, 232
Essence, reifying ideas and bestowing power (footnote), 108;
the forms of Plato (footnote), 115; cease reifying (footnote), 233
* Everything Happens for a Reason, or Does It? 35
Evidence over personal peace, 27
Evil, reality of, 252-259; evil orbit, defined, 254
Evolution, scientific faith in big bang (footnote), 271
Excuse It or Own It, 102, 103
Excuse-Making Psychology, xi, 146, 150, 212-214, 259
Fact vs. Truth, discerning between, 219, 220
Faith as independent entity, 112, 113; faith in Big Bang (footnotes), 158, 173, 271
Fake it till you make it, 171
* Fallibility of Following Feelings, 198
* False Advertising: The Case of Claude, 101
False Advertising, selling victimhood, 101, 189
* False Feelings: BRIAR Emotions, 194
* False Solution: Blame as Balm, 184
Feeling, evidence of truth, 161, 163
Feeling safe with a person, Dinah M. Craik quote, x
Feelings, (spirit) as evidence of truth, 161, 163;
(physiological) feelings are following you, 198
* Final Freedom, 260
Final Freedom, 144, 151, 206, 225, 256, 266, choice between basic natures, 206;
to choose one's attitude, Frankl quote, 260
Flat-Earth Assumptions, 159
Fool, defined by Mark Twain, 157
* Fooling Yourself: Slightly Blind or Oblivious, 155
Football handoff analogy, behavior co-authored, 254, 257
Forms, Plato's assertion of essence (footnote), 114, 115
* Fountain from which Emotions Flow, 125
Four possibilities of Be True & Betray, 251
Frankl, Viktor, attaining the values of suffering, 12; yielding to despair,
a decision, 15; future focus of logos therapy, 236
* Free to Choose, Not Really, 43
Free Will, the limited nature of, 43-46; music analogy, 45-46
* From the Heart, not the Head! 141
Genealogy of evil acts, explained, 254, 261
Generalities, a mirage over specific reality, 112;
Generalville, a.k.a., Esoteric City, State of Mind, 232
Get Over It, lyrics by the Eagles, 53
Gibran, Kahlil, on pain and suffering, 14
Gold Metal Resenter, story of resenting, 187-189
Habermas, Jergen, language, a broad definition, 74
Handoff, football analogy, behavior co-authored, 254, 257
Hayakawa, S. I., on words, 107
Harvest, Law of the, 41, 42
Haunted by memories, 259
Healing emotional scars, 246-248
Heart, treasures of, Jesus quote, 74, 89; keep thy heart, 142, 169;
changing past via, 244-248; metaphor explained, 267
Heart vs. Head, 141; satisfying solutions, 265
Heaven's Help, recovery occurs with, 165, 265, 266, 270, 272, 274
Hedonism, vs. humanity, 168; defined, 172; vs. altruism, 205, 206
* Heisenberg Effect, 83
Heraclitus, on change, x, 218, 274
Hermeneutic circle, 208, 209
High-way vs. hard-way, 164, 239
* Hitting Myself with the Misery Stick, 28
Holocaust, origins of evil acts, 259
Honesty vs. being blunt, 221-223
* How Words Work, 77
* Human Being: Inward Tone and Intent, 67
Human Doing vs. Way of Being, 70, 71, 73
* Human Doing: External Choreography, 64
* Human Doings are Co-Authored, 54
Humble vs. Hiding, 102, 103
Idea, not a thing, but the activity of thinking (footnote), 111
Ideologue, defined (footnote), 214
* If You Can Own It, You Can Change It, 142
* In Contrast to Pure White, 196
* Inescapable Impact Always, 83
Inner Imbalance, need to justify, 29
* Inner Liberty Revisited, 235
Inner Liberty, outer bondage, 11, 12; failure to keep, 15, 33; keeping amid
affliction brings peace, 34; can be invoked immediately, 191;
the liberty to embrace the nature of Light, 206
Innocence, returning to, 271-274
Insanity, one conscious choice at a time, 50;
we choose our crazy behavior (footnote), 256
* Intent Defines the Act, 70
* Invitation to a Justification: Asking Why?, 183
Inward vs outward man, Apostle Paul quote, 34
I-Thou & I-It, ways of being, 85, 86
* It's hard to See in the Dark, 174
It's-Not-Your-Fault Psychology, xi, 146, 150, 212-214, 259
Invictus, poem by W. E. Henley, 286
James, William, on many different social selves, 84
Journey, poem by Reed Bradford, vi
Junction of Choice, retain pain, 24
* Justifying, 177
Justifying, offendedness/victimhood, 29
Karma, the life-balance boomerang, 42; judgments return, 105;
certain seeds bring specific fruit, 198; evidence of Divine Design, 263
King's New Clothes, wearing emotional scars, 234, 235
Know as we are Known, 203
Knowing, flows from abundance of Heart, 201, 230
La La Land, suburb of Esoteric City, hyperventilating abstract air, 232
Language, a broad definition, 74; you can't say what you mean, 75, 76;
nature of, 76, 77; mistranslation,
The Bobby, 79; mistranslation story, The Bag, 81;
limitation summary, 81, 106, 107, 113, 114
Law of motion, Newton's, 252
Law of Harvest, what goes around, comes around, 41, 42
Lawyers, legal lying, expected and accepted in culture, 212-215
Learning, follow curiosity, viii;
learning paradox, 209; learning from past tragedy vs. scarred thinking, 236, 237;
learning from the past, Mark Twain quote, 237
* Learning the Lessons that Emotions Teach, 129
Less-than-Love vs Pure Love, emotions, 196-198
* Letting ME Emerge, 161
Lewis, C.S., on pain, 23
* Life is a Set-Up, 1
* Life is Self-Correcting, 40
Life is self-correcting, consequence is teacher, 240;
evidence of Divine Design, 263
Light, voice of, heard in the Light, 271
* Light of Innocence, 162
Linguistic conditioning, S. I. Hayakawa quote, 107
Living Simply, poem by Dr Matt, 101
Logos therapy, Frankl's future-focus, 236
* Looking Glass Self, 90
Looking glass, seeing ourselves in, 203, 204
* Losing Inner Innocence, 163
Love, power of, 112
Lucifer's latest release, buying Satan's CDs, 261
* Making a Mammoth Paradigm Shift, 114
Mastering a challenge means
mastering yourself, xv
Masterpiece, who you become is, 274
Masters of fate, Shakespeare, 39
Maxwell, Neil, patient endurance, 43
Mechanical cause vs meaningful be-cause, 26, 55, 238, 255, 261
Mental, machinations vs. Mercy, 89, 270;
willful tenacity vs. yielding, 164, 165, 169, 266, 273, 286, 288;
programming, futility for seeing past differently, 227;
changing past via, 244, 245; Mental Illness Alibi, 259, 260;
Metaphysical essence, reifying (footnote), 233
Migraine Mental Block, 176
Mind, versus brain (footnote), 49; mind vs. minding (footnote), 246
Mirror, social, 90-92; invisible, a.k.a., immaculate, 93, 97, 99;
seeing ourselves in, 203, 204;
Misery, hitting myself with "m" stick, 28;
the paradox of self-made misery, 27, 33, 188, 257
Moral behavior, individual accountability for, 55, 56
* More Distortions due to A Way of Talking, 110
Mountain climbing analogy, 137
Mud, instead of healthy meal, 231, 250, 256, 257; boring party, 226
Multi-faceted activity, emotion is, 120
Murder vs. taking life, Act-as-a-Whole (footnote), 216
Murray, W. H., meeting your heart's desire, 271
Music analogy, limits to choice, 45, 46
Myth, definition of myth applied to conceiving self, 92
* Myth of Emotional Scars, 223
* Nature of Language, 76
Natures, basic, not one but two, 205, 206
Near-death, evidence of spirit (footnote), 122
Newton's law of motion, 252
Nietzsche, Friedrich, on language, 75, 80
* Not One, but Two Basic Natures, 205
* Noun-Words that represent Verb-Activity, 108
Offended, 29-31, 187; is offensive, 20, 21; victims get to change, 51
Only vote that counts vs. popular vote, 182
Opportunity out of pain and oppression, 15
Orbit of evil, 253, 254; opposing orbit, defined, 254
* Outer Bondage, Inner Liberty, 12
Outward vs inward man, Apostle Paul quote, 34
* Own It or Excuse It: Clarity vs. Confusion, 102
Owning Stuff, responding to constraints, 18, 19, 144, 145;
the way out of a difficulty, 22; own emotions vs. rationalizing PQ, 135;
can change if own, 142
Pain, purpose of, 23; the paradox of self-made, 27, 33, 188, 257
Paradigm shift, conceiving emotion, 114-118
Paradox, of self-discovery, 96, 97
Party, perception analogy, 226
Passed feeling, conscience ceases to function (footnote), 255
Past, re-membering the, 228-232; dreary dredging as therapy, 238;
scarred and bitter vs. stronger and better, 236, 237; learning from,
Mark Twain quote, 237; wake analogy, who determines, 240-242;
where did it go, 242, 243; changing the past, mind vs. heart, 244-248
Patience, enduring faithfully, Neil Maxwell quote, 43;
essential to clear communication, 82
Paul, apostle, wrestle with unseen evil, quote, 259
Peace, by keeping Inner Liberty, 34; amid severe affliction (footnote), 34;
pain in prospect is peace in practice, 218
Perception, tied to way of being, 127, 226, 227, 229, 230
Permission, evil orbit is only entered by, 253, 254, 258
Pernicious pedigree, origins of evil acts, 254, 261
* Physical Constraints, 8
Physiology of the body, morally neutral, 222, 223
Piano analogy, limits to choice, 45, 46
Pill popping for emotional pain, 147-149
Plant, how to talk to (footnote), 267
Poems: The Journey, vi; Get Over It, 53; Being Alive, 58; Simply Living, 101;
Turbulent Waters 138; Set of the Sail, 140; Invictus, 286;
The Soul's Captain, 288
Point of transition, retain pain, 24
Political correctness, getting the popular vote, 71, 72
Political spin, lies that look good, 71, 72; defined (footnote), 204;
culture expects and accepts lies, 214, 215
Popular vote vs. only vote that counts, 182, 216
Positive self-affirmation vs. Prayer, 265, 266, 268
Postpartum depression, 152
Post-traumatic stew, soup nazi, 231
Power, of faith, 112, 113; power of love, 112; retaining your, 117
Pray Always, best exit strategy for ditch dwelling, 266, 268, 269;
self-talk disconnects prayer, 268; can't pray a lie, 268
Predisposition to respond, 16; responsible for, 51
* Provoke-Ability Quotient: What's your PQ?, 48
Provoke-Ability Quotient, 48-50; choices flow from, 60;
owning vs. rationalizing PQ, 134, 135; high PQ and Satan, 262
Psychological, changing past via, 244, 245
Psychology, Excuse-Making, xi, 146, 150, 212-214, 259;
Cause & Effect Psychology, both fact and fallacy, simultaneously, 241
PTSD, volunteer, not just a victim, 231;
PTS flashbacks, what is really happening , 258
Pure Love vs Less-than-Love, emotions, 196-198
Pure White, in contrast to, 196, 197
* Putting Positive Energy-in-Motion, 136
Quarterback analogy, perceiving self, 155
Questions, best questions lead to best solutions, 157-160; knowing when
you've got good ones, 158; flow from assumptions (footnote), 158;
Source of best questions and answers, 160
* Rationalize or Recover, 217
Rationalize & Resent versus
Recover & Renew, 52;
Rationalizing, vs owning emotional PQ, 134, 135;
can't talk way out of behavior problem, 181, 217; Freudian defense
mechanism (footnote), 215; versus Response-Ability (footnote), 256
* Re-Membering the Past, 228
Re-membering the past, from abundance of Heart, 190, 227, 230
* Re-Sending Negative Energy, 186
Reacting vs responding, 135
Reality, always a thing or thing-in-action, 110, 115;
else no-thing (footnote), 115; illusion of generalities, 112, 233
* Reality Check: Ditch Dwelling, 263
* Reality of Unseen Evil, 252
Reality vs. rhetoric, Jacques Derrida quote, 210
Reason, everything happens for a, 35 Capital "R" vs. regular "r," 36;
depression occurs for, 150; can be un-reasonable, 238;
deceived by giving into, 254, 255
* Recovering the You that is True, 249
Recovery, let happen vs. make happen, 169, 170, 266, 270, 273
Redeemed, from the ditch via Heaven's help, 165, 265, 270, 274
Reifying activities into things, 108-113
Relocation vs. Recovery, xiv
Resentful story, Gold Metal Resenter, 187-189
* Resenting, 185
* Resentment IS Today's Trauma, 190
* Resentment Retention Time, 30
* Resentment Retention Time Revisited, 187
Resentment, brings about suffering of soul, 32; form of
Self-Inflicted Suffering, 190, 192; skew recollection of past, 231, 232
Response & Constraint, 10
Response-Ability, division of, 17-19, 33; own it and you can change it,
17, 22, 142, 181; and blame, 22, 184; not responsible for effects to body 33;
not owning due to Reasons and Fate, 36, 38; for hateful emotions,
51, 52, 109; for disposition to respond, 50, 51, 134, 135; not fully responsible
for doings, 54, 57; owning vs. rationalizing, 135, 173, 174, 177, 178; for
addiction disposition (footnote), 145; owning dis-eases, 146, 150;
no short cuts to character, 149; for drinking poison of resentment, 185, 186;
to keep Inner Liberty, 191, 192; free to choose one way or the other, 217, 218;
richest expression, to respond with love, xiii, 240
* Returning to Innocence, 271
Rhetoric vs. reality, Jacques Derrida quote, 210
Richest reward, who you become, xvi
Riddle, Chauncey, self as the space between two bodies, 68;
the self as a myth to self, 91
Royal blood & bad blood coexist, 68
Rubble, gleaning "reason" from un-reasonable events, 38
Satan, reality of, 252-259; at choice to buy Satan's CDs, 261;
best lies lined with facts, 269, 270; Satan is in the self-talk, 268, 269
* Satisfying Solutions, Head vs. Heart, 265
Scarred thinking vs. what past is willing to teach, 236, 237
Science-speak, 110, 111, (footnote) 233
* Search for Self, Solved, 94
* Seeing and Knowing, 207
* Seeing the Signs in Ourselves, 201
Seeing, flows from abundance of Heart, 89, 167;
recognizing JAR & BRIAR signs, 211
* Seeking Support for Victimhood, 28
Self, as Be-ing, space between two bodies, 68, 69; self as a myth to self, 91, 92;
the search for self solved, 94-96; understanding the emotions of, 105;
self as advertised, victim version, 189; cannot run from, xv, 272, 273
* Self as Advertised, 98
* Self as Language, 74
Self-Betrayal always tied to blindness, 174, 175, 192-194
Self-Concept, formed in social mirror 62
Self-correcting, life is, 40
Self-Deception, definition, 156
* Self-Discovery Paradox, 96
Self-Identity, found in looking glass, viii, 62, 90, 91; versus Being, 63, 64;
myth of, 91, 92; distinguishing from Be-ing, 92, 93;
beyond attributes of body, 94, 95; fully formed by forgetting self, 96, 97
* Self-Inflicted Suffering, 25
Self-Inflicted Suffering, resentment is a form, 190, 192
Self-made misery, why choose, 26, 55
Self-responsibility vs. rationalizing (footnote), 256
Self: Body & Being, 61, 62
* Selfish vs. Empathic, 87
* Separate Words, but not Separated Realities, 123
Serendipity vs. accidents, 37
Set of the Sail, poem by Ella W. Wilcox, 140
Set Up, life is a situational, 2
* Set-Up Flows Both Ways, 57
* Shades of Betrayal: Less-than-Love, 196
* Simple Solution: Un-Doing, 168
Simple vs. Complex, two possible worlds, 166, 167
Simply Living, poem by Dr Matt, 101
* Situational Set Ups, 2
* Situational Suffering, 22, 23
Social Mirror, self-concept formed in, 62; seeing ourselves in, 203, 204
Solomon, keep thy heart, 142, 169
Soup Nazi, making post-traumatic stew, 231
Soul's Captain, poem by Orson F. Whitney, 188
Spin, lies that look good, 71, 72; spin defined (footnote), 204
Spirit, evidence of reality (footnote), 122; the fountain from which
emotions flow, 125; spirit influence confused with emotion, 130, 199, 200;
changing past via, 247
Spoiled prince and royal heritage, 68
Stevenson, R.L., confronting a weakness, 273
Stones, emotional, what is thrown must land, 132, 136, 234
Stink, can't put back in skunk, 58
Story Stretching, 31, 188
Stuck, a self-perpetuating trap, 16, 54; because of ignorance or inability, 44;
definition of deceived / blind, 156; because of who you are, 250;
because lack desire, 272, 273
* Stuck in the Story, 180
Stumbling block vs. building block, adversity can be either, 25, 236
Suffering, situational, xii, 22, 23, 26, 35, 144, 191, 225, 263, 264;
self-inflicted, 24, 25, 33, 35, 191, 192, 264;
the paradox of self-made misery, 27, 33, 188, 257
Suffering of soul, versus bodily pain, 10, 11, 13; resentment one source, 32
Sufficient Cause, 55, 65, 254, 255
Superior premise, xi
Talk, can't talk way out of behavior problem, 181, 217
Television Intoxication Disorder, blame Brady Bunch, 213
* Tell-Tale Signs of Betrayal, 173
Tell-tale signs of betrayal, justifying inner imbalance, 29, 177;
vote getting, 29, 30, 181; seeing signs in ourselves, 201-204
* Telling Stories: Anxious vs. Honest, 178
Test & Teacher, adversity, 21
Therapy, as dredging up past, 238
Thermometer analogy, babies are like, 134, 135
Thing or thing-in-action, 110, 115; reality is rooted in substance (footnote), 110
Thoughts, flow from abundance of Heart, 89, 167, 190, 227
Throwing emotional stones, 131, 132, 136, 234
Time, correct conception, 243; keeping free will intact (footnote), 243
* Time Heals All Wounds, Only if you Let It, 52
Train analogy, stopping addiction, 136
Trap, self-perpetuating, 16 (also see Bind and Stuck)
Treasures of the heart principle, 74, 89, 167, 190, 201, 227
True, is not so easy to do, 172, 174
True You, recovering, 141, 249-251
Truth vs. Fact, discerning between, 219, 220
Turbulent Waters, poem by Dr Matt, 138, 139
Twain, Mark, learning from past, quote, 237
* Two Alternatives Only: Be True or Betray, 249
* Two Aspects of the Verb-Self, 73
Two basic natures, not one, 205, 206
* Two Possible Worlds: Simple vs. Complex, 166
* Two Types of Suffering, 22
* Two Ways of Being, 84
* Understanding Whole Emotion, 126
Un-reasonable reasons, 37, 38, 238
Unseen Evil, reality of, 252-259
Verb-Activity, symbolized by noun-words, 108-113;
avoiding non-substantial conceptions of essence (footnotes), 108, 110, 111
* Verb Self, 64
Verb Self, two aspects of, 64, 67, 73
Victimhood, seeking justification for, 29; victims get to change too, 51;
false advertising as v. or victor, 100; get to own stuff (footnote) 185;
vs. victor, 218, 237, 241; victim vs. volunteer, 264
Voice of Light, heard in Light, 272
Vote, the only one that counts vs. popular vote, 216
* Vote Getting (justifying victimhood), 29
* Vote-Getting: Another Tell-Tale Sign, 181
Wake analogy, who determines past, 240-242
Water under the bridge, 58
Warner, C. Terry, cling to problems, 188, 257; change of heart, 267
Way of being affects perception, 88, 89, 127, 226, 227, 229, 230
Way of being, vs. doing, 73; I-Thou & I-It, 85, 86; empathic vs. selfish, 87, 88
Way of talking, distorts conception of emotion, 110
* What Goes Around, Comes Around, 42
* Where did the Past Go? 242
White Canvas, analogy, 196, 197
* Who Am I? Both Body & Being, 61
* Who's Creating the Wake, 240
* Who's to Blame? 20
* Whole Emotion 121
* Why Being True, is not so easy to Do, 172
* Why We Choose Self-Made Misery, 26
Wilcox, Ella, Set of the Sail, poem, 140
Word, not the things they represent, quote by S.I. Hayakawa, 107
Words, handles that grasp world, 208, 210
Words, how they work, 77, 78
Words, mistranslation inevitable:
The Bobby story, 79; The Bag story, 81
Words, you can't say what you mean, 75, 76
Wounds, time heals vs. time wounds heels, 52
Yesterday's dead bones, gnawing on, 232
Yielding vs. willful tenacity, 164, 165, 169, 266, 270, 273, 286, 288
* You Can't Say What You Mean, 75
* You Do Your Dis-Eases, 146
You that is True, recovering, 249-251
* Section Heading
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