Here are the weekly Recaps from the Top Thirteen Couples to the Final Three:
Howdy DWTS Maniacs!
Last week it was Ba Bye for the Bland Bunny: Kim "what's she famous for" Kardashian.
This week Misty May gets injured while practicing the Jive. Does that mean Misty and Maksim get a pass to next week?
Last week gay guy Lance Bass kissed a girl, and he liked it! I swear Lacey is going to persuade thi gay guy to switch his attraction preferences. Check out the fantastic looking lines of Lance and Lacey:
Here's my Less to Best Ranking for Week Number Three:
** - MISTY MAY-TREANOR — Maksim Chmerkovskiy ( J-Score: 21, J-Rank #6 )
Misty May was injured this week. I wonder if Slave-Driver Maksim pushed her too hard BEFORE a proper warm up? On the injury replay, it looks like a FREAK accident: Ruptured Achilles Tendon.
At first, I thought the Beach Volleyball Queen was going to be out for a week, but Misty May is OUT for the season! Yet she vows that she'll be back to dance the Jive in the future!Misty definitely has the Olympic Spirit—You Go Girl!
9 - CLORIS LEACHMAN — Corky Ballas ( Judges Score: 11, Judges Rank #9 )
At this point, having an 82-year-old doing a Jive . . . is getting embarrassing! Cloris has been very clever and funny, but the time has come for Cloris to be kicked to the curb. Bruno called it "wacky . . . beyond comprehension." Carianne described the audience reaction as "off-their-rockers hysterical." And I call it . . . Embarrassing!
Len acknowledged that Corky and Cloris did manage to execute ONE Jive step, amid a lot of prancing and pranks. I expect LOW scores from the judges 5's and 6's. I'm hoping that the Cloris fans will end her charade with DWTS.
Judges Scores: 6, 5, 5 . . . But the burning question is: Will Cloris fans have enough votes to keep her around another week? I hope not for the sake of quality dancing.
8 - ROCCO DISPIRITO — Karina Smirnoff ( J-Score: 20, J-Rank #8 )
It was a very cute routine in the Gestalt. BUT when you just watch Rocco apart from Karina's pretty embellishments, . . . he's like a floppy puppy dog. Very cute, but . . . elegant V-Waltz? NOT!
I'm smelling more Score Inflation, to make the lesser dancers APPEAR more competitive. In the end it all DWTS Smoke and Mirrors. There you go: 7, 7, 6 (with Bruno being the only realistic Judge).
7 - CODY LINLEY — Julianne Hough ( J-Score: 21, J-Rank #7 )
Another edition of "Dancing with the Spazz." Cody's awkward was showing through painfully so. Three 7's . . . the judges were generous, which was the theme of this show tonight.
6 - MAURICE GREENE — Cheryl Burke ( J-Score: 24, J-Rank #3 )
Carianne calls Maurice "a wild untamed beast." She got that right. Bruno tell Maurice he's "rough around the edge." I was thinking Mr. Greene was rough all the way through the middle . . . to the core.
I'm expecting Maurice to be a whole lot more coordinated than he is: Can you say "Dancing with the Spazz?" The Judges ended up being kind to Maurice, I'm expecting Score Inflation. Maybe he get 7's but I give it 6's—we'll see how the scores come down?
I called it: Score Inflation BIG TIME. 3 — 8's. That's according to the DWTS Producers wicked plot: Let's make Maurice and Cheryl more "apparently" competitive by pumping up their scores. Well it didn't work with me. It was NOT better than the previous two performances by Lance & Lacey, and Susan & Toni.
5 - TONI BRAXTON — Alec Mazo ( J-Score: 22, J-Rank #4 )
The MC comments "It's the first Viennese Waltz that made me want to trash a hotel room." That's because the beautiful classical music was intermittently AMPED UP with Heavy Metal Guitar segments. I thought the Heavy Metal touches were a huge distraction to what might have been an elegant and classy V-Waltz.
Len had essentially the same reaction as I did (except he didn't mention the ghastly musical arrangement). He told Alec and Toni to trash the gimmicks and the tricks, and emphasize Toni B's more than sufficient dance talent.
After the crumby comments from the Judges, . . . surprise, surprise, . . . judging generosity continues: 8, 7, 7 — what is UP with that? The judges were suffering from PTSD: Post Traumatic Scoring Disorder. Anyway, I disagree with their evaluation and put Alec and Toni in the bottom half of my rankings.
4 - SUSAN LUCCI — Tony Dovolani ( J-Score: 21, J-Rank #6 )
Susan was nursing an injured ankle. Boo Hoo. Her dancing was a little careful, and I don't think it was entirely due to the bad ankle. In a previous performance, Len said he wanted MORE "slut" and Less dainty. But even though Susan takes "baby steps" throughout the routine, on the bright side, her execution was very clean!
3 - LANCE BASS — Lacey Schwimmer ( J-Score: 22, J-Rank #5 )
Lance and Lacey try traditional with their V-Waltz. While they did appease old-fogey Len Goodman, their normal contemporary pizzazz was lacking in this performance—which was Judge Bruno's complaint. Judge Carianne loved it and gave it an "8"—great!
It's kinda hard to pizzazz-up a Viennese Waltz anyway. It was just Ah-right with me.
2 - WARREN SAPP — Kym Johnson ( J-Score: 25, J-Rank #2 )
Aussie Kym and Big Boy were amazingly nibble in this V-Waltz. I've got to think that the Gestalt of the Dance—the whole, undivided meaning and impact—is simply the way each dance is going to LAND on the viewers! Kym was exquisitely graceful, and Big Boy was THERE every step of the way—and THERE is a BIG WAY, and BIG people tend to be.
Holly Smokes, the Judges are whipped into an insane frenzy: Carianne give the performance a 9 — which is the second 9 of the season, followed by two 8's. It the Gestalt that GOT to the Judges. Kym was very beautiful, and you just couldn't deny or be distracted from her exquisite contribution—even while dancing with the human wall.
The evil DWTS Producers are cooking up a contrived competition again. Pumping up the scores of the lesser dancers, to make it SEEM like they are being competitive.
1 - BROOKE BURKE — Derek Hough ( J-Score: 28, J-Rank #1 )
Brooke and Derek have "brought it" every week. I expected a lot from them . . . and they definitely did not disappoint! They were the only couple to do a Reverse Turn the way it ought to be done!
Their scores were not inflated: two 9's and the seasons first 10. Brunette Barbi and Ken Doll are clearly the couple to beat!
It should be between Chef Rocco and Cloris Leachman. We'll find out who has the bigger Fan Base. Cloris deserves the boot based upon dancing alone, but with Misty May out of the competition, . . . DWTS may decide to give all the couples a week of grace?
Here's the scenario . . . they put everyone through the gut-wrenching suspense of elimination, . . . and when they come to eliminating ONE of the final two couples . . . they will say "April Fools . . . we're not eliminating anyone tonight."
Results Show Recap:
Rocco and Karina were the low vote getters as I suspected—but they were also NOT kicked to the curb quite yet. Because of Misty's injury, no one was eliminated this week. They did, however, identify Rocco and Karina as the low vote getters (who would have been eliminated, had Misty not had her misfortune).
Lance and Lacey were in the "perceived" bottom two (view at 5:45). It seems the show wants to give everybody a turn riding the emotional roller coaster that IS . . . being in the Bottom Two—and then being saved at the last possible moment.
I wasn't worried for Lance and Lacey . . . at all. They've been dancing well and their Fan Base has to be pretty solid between Boy Band Fans and SYTYCD Fans.
From the beginning of the Show, Brooke & Derek are SAVED first—after being the top scorers in all three weeks thus far. THEN, cloris and Corky are SAVED next—the lowest scorers in all three weeks thus far. So, with this kind of RANDOM saving-order, it's not even worth mentioning the ORDER in which the Stars are saved—the "no particular order" system is what DWTS will follow.
It is worth noting that Maurice Greene & Cheryl received an INFLATED SCORE of 24 (three x 8) yesterday, and . . . during the Results Show, Maurice and Cheryl were among the first couples to be saved.
Based upon his dancing, Maurice should be in the bottom half of the pack. However, Maurice may be getting a lot of popular votes; thus, it appears that DWTS Producers have decided to parallel his vote-popularity with higher scores from the Judges. YES, I'm talking CONSPIRACY here! So, when Maurice hangs around for a few weeks longer . . . it makes sense that he should (based upon his inflated scores). But I already see past the Smoke and Mirrors, and am warning the rest of the world of the rouse!
Tonight's results show had some entertaining dancing & singing performances. Check'em out:
** Edyta joins Maksim to do Misty May's Jive that Might Have Been at 6:40
** Cool and the Gang sing a medley of their best-loved hits, while three Couples do some disco-friendly dances, starting at 1:45
** Doing some pizzazz-filled, precision high-kicking: The Radio City Rockettes at 1:45 on this same Video Clip, brother and sister duo Julianne and Derek Hough tear up the dance floor while, Jennifer Hudson does some soulful crooning at 4:20
** At 2:20 the "Bermuda Triangle" of the DWTS Dance Floor is chronicled; more injuries in Season Seven compared to all others.
I don't know if these hyperlinks will last for long: ABC/Dick Clark Productions is going after copy rite infringement with a vengeance! I've already had half my Video Links SHUT DOWN, and many of the You Tube Submitters have quit trying to submit more DWTS Videos. We shall see how this dastardly plot unfolds.
P.S. Here's the Recap and Review for DWTS Week #4
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Penn Jillette, Magician & Kym Johnson — 12th
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Josie Maran, Model & Alec Mazo — 12th
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Paulina Porizkova, Supermodel Alec Mazo — 11th
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Tucker Carlson, Political Pundit & Elena Grinenko — 10th
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Kenny Mayne, ESPN Sports Anchor & Andrea Hale — 10th
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Trista Rehn, The Bachelorette & Louis van Amstel — 6th
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